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<title>Read excerpt from Budget Justified: The Waste, Fraud, and Abuse of Government Workers (ebook)</title>
<meta name="keywords" content="budget justified, lisa schaefer, waste, fraud, abuse, government, contractor, government employees, subcontractor, dave cooperman, kevin mayberry, ted taylor, elizabeth sibley, eli sibley, laura fischer, anthony smitha, brian razzino, andy kiser, sydney shabazz, harassment, sexual harassment, faa, marion blakey, trailer, movie, web series, webisodes, ifshewereaman, if she were a man, washington, dc, comedy, drama, boss, affair, engineers, women engineer, female engineer, phd, arizona state university, office, the office, government spending, government waste, sleeping on the job, groping, psychiatrist, runner, track, dancing monkey, suck, illegitimate children, congress, hooker">
<meta name="description" content="Budget Justified - what REALLY goes on in government offices. True story. Watch the movie, webisodes, & read the book">
<meta name="author" content="Lisa Schaefer">
<meta name="date" content="2013-08-15T14:21:55-04:00">
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<p class="Normal-P"><span class="Normal-C">Lisa is an engineering subcontractor working in FAA offices. She hid a video camera
to document the groping her officemate does when no one’s looking. What else will
the camera find at the FAA?</span></p>
<h3 class="Heading-3-P"><span class="Heading-3-C">EXT. FEDERAL AGENCY HEADQUARTERS</span></h3>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Opening credits for all episodes: Capitol is in the background. Zoom in on a window
of a federal building. Play goofy music.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">Shooting the Scene</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">This was shot on September 11, 2008. It was a nice sunny day to go downtown. The
date was coincidental. So was the building.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I didn’t care what building I used for opening credits, as long as it looked like
an office. I scoped out Pennsylvania Avenue, Maryland Avenue, and the National Mall.
They each had direct views of the Capitol. I needed to be on the west side of the
Capitol so I wouldn’t have a view of a bunch of silhouettes in front of the early
afternoon sun. The National Mall didn’t have any office-<wbr>like buildings, so that was
out. The office buildings on Pennsylvania Avenue weren’t as close to the Capitol
as the ones on Maryland. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">The office building with the best view of the Capitol in the background happened
to be… FAA Headquarters. Shortly after lunch, hundreds of federal employees milled
around. I stood on the sidewalk and aimed my video camera at the FAA building. On
the seventh anniversary of the aviation attacks on the Pentagon. I was concerned
that a security guard – or much worse: a former coworker returning from lunch – would
approach and ask what I was up to. But this is Washington, where authorities are
more concerned about my seventy year old mother entering a museum with a bag of airline
peanuts than real threats that don’t achieve security theater. Nobody bothered me.
</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">In Real Life</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I didn’t work at headquarters. I worked a few blocks away. I don’t know who works
behind the window shown in the opening credits. Could be a conference room or a storage
room for computers from the 1960’s. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Nah, couldn’t be storage for computers from the 1960’s. Those computers are still
in use at the FAA.</span></p>
<h3 class="Heading-3-P"><span class="Heading-3-C">INT. WINDOW</span></h3>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Shot out of a second story window of Federal Agency Headquarters. Looking down, we
see BARRY, a fifty-<wbr>something government engineering manager in a suit, and JANE,
a twenty-<wbr>something professional-<wbr>looking engineer, as they walk toward the entrance
of the building. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA (OS – right behind camera)</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Barry and Jane coming to work together? Glad I brought my camera.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">Shooting the Scene</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">OS is Off Screen in screenwriter lingo.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">As I held a camera way above my head aimed at Ted (Barry) and Eli (Jane), I stood
on the top step of a ladder perched on the top of a staircase that led to an office
building entrance. No window involved. Meanwhile, Anthony, who plays the New Guy,
held the ladder steady underneath me. I was wearing a skirt. We had just shot a restroom
scene where one of the characters makes a comment about my skirt and I didn’t have
time to change out of wardrobe. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">It felt like a ridiculous pose. I teetered up there as elegantly as possible, although
I wasn’t worried that Anthony might look up my skirt. When he came to audition, I
asked if he would be interested in the role of Charlie. He said there was no way
he could touch a woman’s rear and be able to finish the scene. Not that Dave (Charlie)
pulled it off without some embarrassment. I wish more guys were embarrassed about
touching women’s rear ends.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">The original version of this scene didn’t have the voice-<wbr>over. During editing, several
people critiqued the first cut of </span><span class="Normal-C2">Budget Justified</span><span class="Normal-C1">. They didn’t know what was going
on in this first shot. They expected to see me, the lead character. After brainstorming,
we determined that this shot needed a voice-<wbr>over, hinting at what Lisa was up to.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">The reason I’m not in the first shot is that this story isn’t about me. Yes, it’s
from my point of view, but I’m not one of the thousands of federal employees and
contractors still subject to the follies of government managers. The story is about
how federal agencies’ management style, or lack thereof, affects the way your taxpayer
dollars, and government employees, are used. </span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">In Real Life</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">As I wrote this, I imagined the parking garage at my former employer, also an FAA
contractor. Our building was in the suburbs where we had no contact with FAA employees.
Management preferred it that way. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">We were nowhere near a Metro station, so everyone drove to work. Well, everyone except
me and two other people (out of several hundred employees). The three of us usually
took the bus. But everyone else arrived through the parking garage. And usually not
in pairs, as Barry and Jane do here. Parking was free; no need to carpool. So when
anyone arrived together, it didn’t go unnoticed.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">It took me a long time to feel like I had left that job, slipping out slowly, cutting
hours to part time to teach at a local university. I had been well-<wbr>integrated into
the culture at Former Employer. I had lots of friends. Everyone knew me. I was one
of the ‘popular’ people there. Not in the high school sense, but because all the
staff wanted me to work on projects with them. They knew I always came through with
what I said I’d do. Upper management knew I was competent and had faith in me.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">That wasn’t quite the case with some of the lower management. Because I knew their
foibles and they knew I didn’t care much to validate them. I never confronted lower
management about anything they got away with, but neither did I pretend that everything
management did was so very clever.</span></p>
<h3 class="Heading-3-P"><span class="Heading-3-C">INT. HALLWAY</span></h3>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">The entire screen is covered by rattling blinds as the camera is jolted away from
the window. Quick PAN TO CHARLIE, a thirty-<wbr>something engineer, standing right next
to the camera. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">CHARLIE</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Hey Lisa. Whatcha doing with that box?</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Charlie nods toward the camera.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA (OS)</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Oh. It’s just a software box.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Charlie looks toward the window.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">CHARLIE</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">I think our boss has a new girlfriend.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA (OS)</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Which boss? </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">CHARLIE </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">That one.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Charlie points out the window at Barry.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">Shooting the Scene</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Dave (Charlie) and I stood in the conference room on the seventh floor of an office
building downtown. The view outside was an alley. Not the entrance to a building.
If you freeze the frame where the blinds are partly open, you'll get a glimpse of
a brick wall.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Dave is much more quiet and shy in person. It was just the two of us in this conference
room while we shot this scene. He didn’t initiate conversation, so I asked him about
his other acting gigs while we set up. He spoke about the movies </span><span class="Normal-C2">Meter Maids</span><span class="Normal-C1"> and
</span><span class="Normal-C2">Deadlands</span><span class="Normal-C1"> with enthusiasm. Even though acting is his side gig, he’s pretty serious
about it.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Hopefully you’ve figured out that the premise here is that I’m hiding the camera
inside a software box that I carry around the office. Most of the time it’s supposedly
sitting on a bookshelf in someone’s office. Although in reality, the bookshelves
were moved away so that we could put the camera on a tripod.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">In Real Life</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">One morning as soon as one of my coworkers arrived at work, he came past my office
and said, “I think your boss has a new girlfriend.” </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">This was a confusing statement to me. First of all, how would he have any information
about my boss’s love life. Second of all, which boss was he referring to. It was
a ‘matrixed’ organization. I had several project managers, I managed a project that
was split into pieces and managed by other staff members, any of the supervisors
in my department were allowed to ask me to work on something for them, and when my
supervisor was unresponsive, his supervisors would come directly to me for support.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">The most likely ‘boss,’ the one whom I talked to the most, was married. A quiet,
decent man who didn’t go around harassing women.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">It turned out that my coworker was indeed referring to my married boss. My coworker
had seen Boss and one of his subordinates, a very ‘close friend’ of Boss, drive into
work together that morning. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">“You must be misinformed,” I told my coworker. Or maybe I said something more like,
“What the hell are you talking about.”</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">In the weeks after that strange declaration of a new girlfriend, I noticed that Boss
frequently snuck in and out of conference rooms, his office, and the entire building
with his very close female ‘friend.’ I wasn’t the only one who witnessed this. According
to conversations with others who worked with Boss, the activities between him and
his friend/mistress had been off and on over several years. Sneaking around was more
frequent shortly after each of his promotions. It would cool off as soon as she received
her subsequent promotions. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I make light of Boss’s alleged love life here. I believe the situation was more complex.
He and Mistress had been good friends for a long time. Since his marriage wasn’t
ending any time soon, they knew where they stood with each other. It seemed to be
more than a fling, but nothing that would ever become permanent.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Fooling around was part of the FAA culture with its contractors. One of Former Employer’s
female managers almost lost a marriage over a fling with one of the FAA managers.
One of Former Employer’s vice presidents had a fling with one of the staff and did
lose his marriage over it. Someone got shot in the parking garage for having a fling
with another guy’s wife.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Interestingly, Boss was only one of several guys in the office that Mistress had
been seen sneaking off with at various times of day and night. I don’t think he cared.
Made it less likely that she'd cause problems with his wife.</span></p>
<h3 class="Heading-3-P"><span class="Heading-3-C">INT. WINDOW</span></h3>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Barry and Jane out the window, he puts his hand on her back as they enter the building.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA (OS)</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Charlie, that one’s married.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">Shooting the Scene</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Dave ad-<wbr>libbed at the end of each take. The first time, he said, “I don’t think he
cares.” He was lighthearted and I laughed. The second time he said, “She likes them
that way.” I could’ve left the ad-<wbr>libs out, but the second one made a statement about
Charlie’s character – he thinks women like fooling around with married men. And he
wanted in on the action.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">The sidewalk shown in this scene isn’t in front of a government building. It’s on
K Street, near all the big lobbyists and big corporations. I liked how the busy street
in downtown Washington gave the feel of a city that looked busy on the outside where
a bunch of fooling around was happening on the inside.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">In Real Life</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Our offices were near the L’Enfant Plaza and Smithsonian Metro stations in Washington.
On the National Mall nearby, people play Frisbee and go jogging alongside the long
grassy field amongst museums and federal buildings. We were in a cul-<wbr>de-<wbr>sac near
a super-<wbr>expensive hotel and didn’t get much car or foot traffic. But we did see several
limos. Rumor has it that Jennifer Lopez got out of one of them. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Many of the men I’ve worked with over the years had second-<wbr>class-<wbr>status opinions
of women. Our culture encourages women to take the role of second class – to serve
men’s sexual demands and to be household servants. I wanted to portray Charlie as
someone who likes having women as second class coworkers and feels entitled to use
lower status coworkers to boost his self importance. </span></p>
<h3 class="Heading-3-P"><span class="Heading-3-C">INT. LISA & CHARLIE’S OFFICE</span></h3>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA, a Tina Fey type, glasses, late thirties, dressed Washington-<wbr>professional (not
Hollywood-<wbr>“professional”) and Charlie walk into their shared office/cubicle. Charlie
puts down his briefcase, Lisa puts the camera “software box” on a shelf and goes
toward her chair. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Charlie is in the way. He motions Lisa over – entice her closer so he can tell her
a “secret.”</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">CHARLIE</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Why would they come to work together? Barry lives in the Virginia suburbs. Jane lives
in Maryland.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Hm. Barry’s wife is in Texas visiting her mom.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">CHARLIE</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">No wonder Jane got a promotion. Like I said. A new girlfriend.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">He slaps Lisa on the butt. Lisa is peeved.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">Shooting the Scene</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Of course the real reason for getting Lisa to come over to him was so Charlie could
get some of his own action. He wants to have what the managers take for granted.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I hope viewers of this episode caught the concept that my character was putting the
camera (inside a software box) on a bookshelf and weren’t wondering why I was so
close to the camera that all you see is my neck. I put the camera on a shelf several
times throughout </span><span class="Normal-C2">Budget Justified</span><span class="Normal-C1"> to remind the viewer that this is supposed to be
stealth footage of something actually happening in the office.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">My husband, Randy, was the cameraperson for this scene. I think Dave felt nervous
about patting my butt in front of my husband. At first I thought Randy would weird
out about. I was weirded out about it. Especially since I had told Dave to do it
by writing it into the script. But Randy was cool about the whole thing. He knows
I don’t make big video projects for the purpose of getting someone to grab my butt.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I could’ve gone through a search process to find a cameraperson to shoot this scene,
but I chose Randy based on one criterion: He was there. Since the shtick for </span><span class="Normal-C2">Budget
Justified</span><span class="Normal-C1"> is that the whole thing is captured by Lisa’s hidden camera, the cameraperson
didn’t need all sorts of complex camera skills. And Randy was there because this
office is in my house. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">The desk set is a bit fancier than what you’d find in a federal government office.
The entire partners desk – desktop, file drawers, bookshelves, cabinet doors – is
made of sturdy wood. The walls are painted dark green. There’s an occasional glimpse
of white carpet, baseboards and crown molding. But it was the perfect location for
shooting </span><span class="Normal-C2">Budget Justified</span><span class="Normal-C1"> because didn’t need to arrange for access to the location
every time we wanted to shoot. </span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">In Real Life</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Before the days of cameras in every phone, it was illegal to bring cameras to work.
Perhaps because they didn’t want taxpayers to be able to check up on how their money
was being spent. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Though I never had a hidden video camera at the FAA nor in any contractor's office,
I kept a record of what was going on in a blog I started after about a month of witnessing
consistent inappropriate behavior. Because I knew my reaction to Mr. Friendly’s advances
was inconsistent. Sometimes I’d tell him to knock it off, sometimes I’d ignore him.
I wasn’t sure if a reaction, even if it was to tell him he was pissing me off, was
exactly what he was hoping to get out of me. Just like some of the FAA managers got
a perverse kick out of insulting their employees, Mr. Friendly thought it was funny
to upset me.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I hoped that if I could understand and monitor the trend of his behavior versus mine
in the blog, I’d figure out how to handle him so I could prevent becoming fearful
of coming to work. Plus I wanted to have a document outlining his actions.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Like several people I’ve worked with throughout my life, Mr. Friendly’s behavior
was extremely accommodating most of the time, interspersed with occasional bullying
stints. When I was in high school, I thought these people behaved this way toward
me because of something I had done or something wrong with me. But as I entered college,
I acknowledged that these were generally toxic people, no matter how overly-<wbr>nice
they acted when it was convenient.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Mr. Friendly had a knack for making me laugh. He was full of off-<wbr>the-<wbr>cuff jokes.
He often told me about interesting things that had gone on in the office. He was
always willing to tell me about office history and his version of office politics.
</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Our office didn’t have any actual projects going on. None of my coworkers had a role
they were responsible for. Thus there weren’t many methods for observing office interaction
other than going around the office bothering people with chit chat. Occasionally
I had some data to look up, or came across a document that needed more context, so
I was able to come up with legitimate discussion topics as excuses to drop by coworkers’
offices. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">But since I was crammed alone into the corner of our floor most of the time, Mr.
Friendly’s visits to my cubicle were my best source of anecdotal information. Not
only was he my office entertainment, he was one of my very few knowledge sources.</span></p>
<h3 class="Heading-3-P"><span class="Heading-3-C">INT. LISA & BRIAN’S KITCHEN</span></h3>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">BRIAN, a big guy in his late thirties, wearing dress shirt and tie as though he just
got home from work, cuts celery on cutting board at kitchen counter. Knife block,
basket of tomatoes, and another cutting board nearby. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Lisa enters, still wearing the white boucle jacket and purple silk pants she had
worn to work earlier that day.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Hi Brian.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">BRIAN </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Hi Sweetie. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Brian looks toward the camera.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">BRIAN </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Oh, there’s our video camera. I was looking for it earlier. Where was it?</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">I took it to work. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Lisa picks up a tomato and knife, starts slicing tomatoes to help with dinner.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">BRIAN </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Oh. Why?</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">There’s a guy at work. Wandering hands. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Lisa wiggles hands. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Brian looks at the camera, picks up a big knife, looks it over very carefully. A
good weapon if he ever needs it. He sighs and puts the knife back down.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">I wanted to document what I’m going though. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P0"><span class="Normal-C0">Oh really? Confused look from Brian.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">To be able to stand back and take an objective look at what’s happening. Because
sometimes I think he’s hilariously goofy. Other times I am pissed. I’m not sure how
to feel about it. Or what to do about it.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">BRIAN </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">Why don’t you tell somebody?</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P2"><span class="Normal-C0">LISA</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P3"><span class="Normal-C0">I’m a subcontractor. I’m not in a position to go around tattling on a fed. And if
I send an email to my HR, I’m lucky if I get a reply. If I leave a voice mail, I
never hear back. So am I supposed to email a complaint about sexual harassment? I
don’t even want to think about where that might get forwarded.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">Shooting the Scene</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">What better kitchen to use as Lisa and Brian’s kitchen in </span><span class="Normal-C2">Budget Justified</span><span class="Normal-C1"> than Lisa
and Randy’s real life bright yellow kitchen? But not simply because it’s in my house.
As luck would have it, there’s no wall between my kitchen and living room. So we
can watch Lisa and Brian talking toward the camera while they prepare dinner on the
speckled stone countertop, rather than a shot of our behinds while we talk at a wall.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I had Andy Kiser (who plays Husband Brian) over to shoot his scenes on a hot day
in July. The scene we shot before this was outdoors. I’d been wearing a t-<wbr>shirt with
a pink jog bra underneath. I removed the t-<wbr>shirt and we rehearsed a few times while
Husband Randy set up the camera. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">When Randy was ready, he turned on the camera, then Andy and I did the scene for
‘real.’ Except it wasn’t for real. In the middle of the scene, I realized I forgot
to put on the white long sleeved jacket I had worn for the previous scene. So in
the outtakes of this episode, you’ll see that I abruptly interrupt myself mid-<wbr>dialogue
by slamming my hand on the kitchen counter and announcing my faux pas, “I’m not wearing
my costume.” </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Costume! Like I was producing some sort of Halloween movie. No real movie producer
would call it a costume. I believe she’d call it ‘wardrobe.’ </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I included outtakes at the end of each episode because not only are they fun to watch,
but seeing the actors being themselves makes them seem more human. Especially me.
I’m supposedly playing myself but…I’m not speaking off the top of my head. The actors
are better at being someone else than I am at being myself.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Perhaps some day the whole story will be rewritten, reshot, and reedited. But by
then I’ll be so sick of the story, I won’t want to be there.</span></p>
<h4 class="Heading-4-P"><span class="Heading-4-C">In Real Life</span></h4>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">My husband, Randy, and I have more original nick names for each other than Sweetie.
Of course they’re too ridiculous to throw in as dialogue at the beginning of a web
series. I rarely call Randy by name (and certainly never call him Brian). More likely,
I’d call him Huz. To get used to the concept of being married, I started calling
him Husband after our wedding in 1994. I’ve called him Huz ever since. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Unlike Andy, Randy’s not a big guy. He wouldn’t make knife jokes when telling him
about office groping. I didn’t want my fictional husband to seem too much like my
real husband. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">In </span><span class="Normal-C2">Budget Justified</span><span class="Normal-C1">, I often mention contractors and subcontractors. Like most government
agencies, the FAA hires lots of contractors. Sometimes the contractors hire several
subcontractors rather than employees to soak up the budget – I mean to do the ‘work.’
In my case, a huge international contractor hired a tiny subcontractor, or headhunter,
to find me. Even though I sat in FAA offices with FAA employees, the contract between
Huge Contractor and Tiny Subcontractor said I would be an ‘employee’ of Tiny Subcontractor
for six months. After that, I was supposed be hired as a permanent employee of Huge
Contractor. Or so they told me. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">‘Employee’ is in quotes because I had no contact with any of the other employees
of Tiny Subcontractor. Tiny Subcontractor was based in another state. The managers
at Huge Contractor interviewed me. I was the only person in the office employed by
Tiny Subcontractor. In fact, I had never heard of Tiny Subcontractor before, was
not acquainted with anyone else who had ever worked for them, and never met any of
Tiny Subcontractor’s other ‘employees.’</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">Tiny Subcontractor had contacted me by email to ask if I was interested in the job.
I have no idea where they found me. Some of the FAA employees and contractors in
that office had known me previously. The only contact I had with Tiny Subcontractor,
even after I was fired, was by phone, email, or fax. Nobody ever answered their phone,
so I left voice mail. They never called back. If I wanted answers, I had to send
email. I received an answer to emailed questions only twice, and I had to wait several
days before getting a response. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">One might wonder whether they even existed. Oh, yeah, they existed. Like the rest
of the FAA and its contractors, they took taxpayer money and didn’t do much for it
besides shuffle the money around.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I thought that after I was formally hired on as permanent staff at Huge Contractor,
I’d have official channels through which I could file a complaint – if they could
be trusted, and if I had reason to believe I wouldn’t be subtly punished for complaining
about a federal employee. But I wasn’t sure the atmosphere at Huge Contractor would
facilitate such a complaint. On my first day of work, one of the Huge Contractor
managers told me that the wife of one of my bosses was hot. I need that information
because…? </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">She had previously worked in that office but stayed at home with the kids shortly
after she got married. The manager didn’t call her intelligent or a valuable employee
or even lovely. Instead, the adjective he chose was ‘hot.’ It struck me as a bad
omen regarding the atmosphere of the office. </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">I didn’t trust that anyone at the FAA would handle reports of sexual harassment well
either. After you watch </span><span class="Normal-C2">Budget Justified</span><span class="Normal-C1"> or read the rest of this book, you’ll understand
why.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P1"><span class="Normal-C1">At Former Employer, a subcontractor had complained about ‘sexual discrimination.’
One of the managers told me that the behavior she was complaining about should’ve
been categorized as sexual harassment. English was not the complainant’s native language,
so she wasn’t well-<wbr>versed in the difference. Since the complaint wasn’t filed as
harassment, the perpetrator wasn’t investigated. However, the woman’s subcontract
was not renewed and she was ‘laid off’ a few months later. Problem ‘solved.’ She
became unemployed, but the perpetrator still had a job. Thus I became very wary of
reporting ‘discrimination’ to FAA contractors. </span></p>
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<p class="Normal-P"><span class="Normal-C4">A few years ago, Dr. Lisa Schaefer was hired by a government contractor. She was
fired the day after a government employee masturbated in front of her. So what did
she do about it? Produce a movie and web series about what it was like working there.</span></p>
<p class="Normal-P"><span class="Normal-C4"> </span></p>
<p class="Normal-P"><span class="Normal-C4">“</span><span class="Normal-C5">Budget Justified</span><span class="Normal-C4">: The Waste, Fraud & Abuse of Government Workers” is a 270 page
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<p class="Artistic-Body-P"><span class="Normal-C6"><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1907634/" target="_blank" style="color:#28960f;text-decoration:none;" title="See the IMDB page">Ebook $4</a></span></p>
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<span class="Artistic-Body-C0">BUDGET JUSTIFIED</span><span class="Artistic-Body-C">: THE BOOK</span></div>
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