diff --git a/_posts/2012-11-03-becoming-a-speaker.html b/_posts/2012-11-03-becoming-a-speaker.html
index f635beb..b13b7e1 100644
--- a/_posts/2012-11-03-becoming-a-speaker.html
+++ b/_posts/2012-11-03-becoming-a-speaker.html
@@ -1,36 +1,31 @@
---
-layout: default
-title: On Motivation - Becoming a Speaker
+layout: post
+title: "On Motivation: Becoming a Speaker"
+summary: About two months ago I announced that I'd be speaking at a conference for the very first time. A friend reached out and asked me a pretty important question. "Why speak at all?"...
---
-
About two months ago I announced that I'd be speaking at a conference for the very first time. A friend reached out and asked me a pretty important question. "Why speak at all?" He was curious about the motivation to speak and why it's so common for programmers (not me) and designers (yes, me) to take up speaking.
+
About two months ago I announced that I'd be speaking at a conference for the very first time. A friend reached out and asked me a pretty important question. "Why speak at all?" He was curious about the motivation to speak and why it's so common for programmers (not me) and designers (yes, me) to take up speaking.
-
My answer's a pretty selfish one. The reason I started speaking is really simple: I want to be a good speaker. Maybe even a great one, someday. And I figure that if I start now, and become acquainted with the almost-certain vomit-inducing/crippling nervousness that is the art of speaking, then maybe I'll have a chance at becoming one.
+
My answer's a pretty selfish one. The reason I started speaking is really simple: I want to be a good speaker. Maybe even a great one, someday. And I figure that if I start now, and become acquainted with the almost-certain vomit-inducing/crippling nervousness that is the art of speaking, then maybe I'll have a chance at becoming one.
-
After forcing myself to rewatch the talks I've given, I've noticed that I've improved after every speaking opportunity. After my most recent talk, I even felt like I'd developed the ability to arrive at, and communicate, actual thoughts and ideas while on stage, rather than just parroting the content of my slides. Now that I've spoken a few times, I've found myself wanting to speak for what I think is a much cooler reason.
+
After forcing myself to rewatch the talks I've given, I've noticed that I've improved after every speaking opportunity. After my most recent talk, I even felt like I'd developed the ability to arrive at, and communicate, actual thoughts and ideas while on stage, rather than just parroting the content of my slides. Now that I've spoken a few times, I've found myself wanting to speak for what I think is a much cooler reason.
-
And that is, if anything I say in the 30-45 minute span that someone allows me to stand on a stage will help anyone who's listening to a. move faster, b. work happier, or c. have a better fucking day, then it's completely worth my time. Every second of it.
+
And that is, if anything I say in the 30-45 minute span that someone allows me to stand on a stage will help anyone who's listening to a. move faster, b. work happier, or c. have a better fucking day, then it's completely worth my time. Every second of it.
-
There are a few things that have made my speaking experiences really good and also a few that have made them what I percieve to be a little bit harder. Here's a few things to consider before you decide to submit a proposal to speak or conversely, abandon speaking completely:
+
There are a few things that have made my speaking experiences really good and also a few that have made them what I percieve to be a little bit harder. Here's a few things to consider before you decide to submit a proposal to speak or conversely, abandon speaking completely:
-
1. Conference size. This may be trivial to some people, but for me, speaking at a smaller, tighter-knit, conference was 10x better than speaking at a massive 10-track conference. And it's not just about being able to fill a room. People at smaller conferences are a lot less likely to be assholes. The conference organizers of a smaller, more personal conference do a much better job of facilitating a safe, respectful environment for both speakers and attendees.
-
-
JSCONFEU set an incredibly high the bar as far as creating an environment I will continue to want to be a part of and contribute to. They even wrote up a Code of Conduct to lay down some ground rules and sent it to every speaker and attendee before the conference began. Every conference should consider doing this. In fact, I'll probably think twice before I speak at another conference whose organizers don't both write and promise to enforce one.
+
1. Conference size. This may be trivial to some people, but for me, speaking at a smaller, tighter-knit, conference was 10x better than speaking at a massive 10-track conference. And it's not just about being able to fill a room. People at smaller conferences are a lot less likely to be assholes. The conference organizers of a smaller, more personal conference do a much better job of facilitating a safe, respectful environment for both speakers and attendees.
-
2. Conference talks are a lot of work. A LOT. Every speaker I've ever known has admitted this. And for some reason I was still surprised to find out that it's true. I even felt like my slides were pretty simple, and still ended up spending no less than 40 hours working on each talk.
+
JSCONFEU set an incredibly high the bar as far as creating an environment I will continue to want to be a part of and contribute to. They even wrote up a Code of Conduct to lay down some ground rules and sent it to every speaker and attendee before the conference began. Every conference should consider doing this. In fact, I'll probably think twice before I speak at another conference whose organizers don't both write and promise to enforce one.
-
3. Inevitably, not everyone will love you or what you have to say. Or maybe they will. But it's probably better that you prepare for the worst. I was recently trolled pretty hard by an attendee of a massive conference here in San Francisco who literally called me out on Twitter for being 'annoying' before my talk had even begun. Some people will just decide to dislike you, and find arbitrary reasons to try to discredit you. Best piece of advice? Ignore them. Those people probably don't deserve your consideration. Additionally, you're not forcing them to listen to you. If they don't like what they're hearing they can leave. In fact, it's probably better that they do, to free up room for people who do want to hear what you have to say and/or might benefit from your talk. WIN-WIN.
+
2. Conference talks are a lot of work. A LOT. Every speaker I've ever known has admitted this. And for some reason I was still surprised to find out that it's true. I even felt like my slides were pretty simple, and still ended up spending no less than 40 hours working on each talk.
-
4. Absolutely be yourself. I was incredibly nervous to speak, both as a newbie and being super yawkard (young + awkward). The only kernel of hope that I had to hold onto was that I'm pretty proud of the person I am and the work that I do. Take those things on stage with you and you'll be fine.
+
3. Inevitably, not everyone will love you or what you have to say. Or maybe they will. But it's probably better that you prepare for the worst. I was recently trolled pretty hard by an attendee of a massive conference here in San Francisco who literally called me out on Twitter for being 'annoying' before my talk had even begun. Some people will just decide to dislike you, and find arbitrary reasons to try to discredit you. Best piece of advice? Ignore them. Those people probably don't deserve your consideration. Additionally, you're not forcing them to listen to you. If they don't like what they're hearing they can leave. In fact, it's probably better that they do, to free up room for people who do want to hear what you have to say and/or might benefit from your talk. WIN-WIN.
-
5. Speaking is probably more rewarding than any of us deserve. After my second talk I got an email that literally just said "Thank you so much for speaking." How fucking awesome is it to feel like you've maybe made someone else's day or the way they work a tiny bit better? The answer is: Too fucking awesome.
+
4. Absolutely be yourself. I was incredibly nervous to speak, both as a newbie and being super yawkard (young + awkward). The only kernel of hope that I had to hold onto was that I'm pretty proud of the person I am and the work that I do. Take those things on stage with you and you'll be fine.
-
In case you're wondering if you have anything to offer as a speaker, there is a particularly great post by one of the organizers of JSCONFEU, Tiffany Conroy, about bringing your unique perspective to the conference world, entitled We Are All Awesome.
+
5. Speaking is probably more rewarding than any of us deserve. After my second talk I got an email that literally just said "Thank you so much for speaking." How fucking awesome is it to feel like you've maybe made someone else's day or the way they work a tiny bit better? The answer is: Too fucking awesome.
-
My talks have finally surfaced on the Internet. And I've made a home for them, here's a link to my talk Because F%$k Photoshop.
+
In case you're wondering if you have anything to offer as a speaker, there is a particularly great post by one of the organizers of JSCONFEU, Tiffany Conroy, about bringing your unique perspective to the conference world, entitled We Are All Awesome.
My talks have finally surfaced on the Internet. And I've made a home for them, here's a link to my talk Because F%$k Photoshop.
diff --git a/_posts/2012-12-2-doing-things-alone.html b/_posts/2012-12-2-doing-things-alone.html
index 66415bc..b907090 100644
--- a/_posts/2012-12-2-doing-things-alone.html
+++ b/_posts/2012-12-2-doing-things-alone.html
@@ -1,18 +1,12 @@
---
-layout: default
+layout: post
title: On Doing Things Alone
+summary: I've changed a lot in thirteen years, but I'm glad I've never forgotten how to be alone...
---
-
When I was eleven I asked my mom if I could go see a movie by myself. "Do you wanna take any friends?" No. "Really? Well, Ok."
-
When I was eleven I asked my mom if I could go see a movie by myself. "Do you wanna take any friends?" No. "Really? Well, Ok."
+
She didn't call me 'weird' and she didn't expect that I was going to sneak off and do something an eleven year old wasn't supposed to. She knew what it was like to enjoy her own company and what it felt like to make peace with being alone.
-
She didn't call me 'weird' and she didn't expect that I was going to sneak off and do something an eleven year old wasn't supposed to. She knew what it was like to enjoy her own company and what it felt like to make peace with being alone.
-
-
Thirteen years later, a Portland cab driver asks "Are you here for work?" No. "Vacation?" Kind of. "Do you know a lot of people here? You must have friends here." No. "Really?"
-
I've changed a lot in thirteen years, but I'm glad I've never forgotten how to be alone.
Thirteen years later, a Portland cab driver asks "Are you here for work?" No. "Vacation?" Kind of. "Do you know a lot of people here? You must have friends here." No. "Really?"
+
I've changed a lot in thirteen years, but I'm glad I've never forgotten how to be alone.
diff --git a/_posts/2013-03-22-there-is-no-emoji-for-martyrdom.html b/_posts/2013-03-22-there-is-no-emoji-for-martyrdom.html
index 130511b..4d2914b 100644
--- a/_posts/2013-03-22-there-is-no-emoji-for-martyrdom.html
+++ b/_posts/2013-03-22-there-is-no-emoji-for-martyrdom.html
@@ -1,24 +1,19 @@
---
-layout: default
+layout: post
title: There is No Emoji for Martyrdom
+summary: So I'm sitting in my hotel room, about 6,000 miles from home. And instead of running through a talk I'm giving at RubyConf Uruguay tomorrow, I'm trying to decide whether I even want to speak at all anymore...
---
-
So I'm sitting in my hotel room, about 6,000 miles from home. And instead of running through a talk I'm giving at RubyConf Uruguay tomorrow, I'm trying to decide whether I even want to speak at all anymore.
+
So I'm sitting in my hotel room, about 6,000 miles from home. And instead of running through a talk I'm giving at RubyConf Uruguay tomorrow, I'm trying to decide whether I even want to speak at all anymore.
-
I'm considering my speaking experiences so far. The bullies who demanded I be more "lady-like" on stage, who tweeted at my employers suggesting I'm not fit to represent them because I use the word "fuck." They weren't giving constructive criticism or feedback. They weren't even making bullshit passive aggressive comments. Those people wanted to hurt me.
+
I'm considering my speaking experiences so far. The bullies who demanded I be more "lady-like" on stage, who tweeted at my employers suggesting I'm not fit to represent them because I use the word "fuck." They weren't giving constructive criticism or feedback. They weren't even making bullshit passive aggressive comments. Those people wanted to hurt me.
-
I've never understood the visceral reaction reserved for women in our industry.
+
I've never understood the visceral reaction reserved for women in our industry.
-
Watching what Adria Richards and the entire community has gone through this past week has been incredibly hard. It's made me reflect on my own experiences, and regret not standing up for myself and others more in the past. Because I felt alone, because I'd "burn bridges," because I was backed into a corner, or because of the economic threat associated with "speaking up" or "going public" with these kinds of experiences.
+
Watching what Adria Richards and the entire community has gone through this past week has been incredibly hard. It's made me reflect on my own experiences, and regret not standing up for myself and others more in the past. Because I felt alone, because I'd "burn bridges," because I was backed into a corner, or because of the economic threat associated with "speaking up" or "going public" with these kinds of experiences.
-
I've tried my best to point things out that are fundamentally wrong within organizations I'm a part of, and have often been dismissed or given the ultimatum of keeping quiet or losing my job.
+
I've tried my best to point things out that are fundamentally wrong within organizations I'm a part of, and have often been dismissed or given the ultimatum of keeping quiet or losing my job.
-
I've digested those experiences, have tried my best to move past them, and instead of continuing to lend power to people who thrive on conflict, have decided to focus my energy toward making my own company and this industry a better place for women to be. It makes me really sad to think that I could be martyred for this.
+
I've digested those experiences, have tried my best to move past them, and instead of continuing to lend power to people who thrive on conflict, have decided to focus my energy toward making my own company and this industry a better place for women to be. It makes me really sad to think that I could be martyred for this.
-
I could really use a hug. But I guess we all could.
I could really use a hug. But I guess we all could.
diff --git a/_posts/2013-04-23-one-year-at-github.html b/_posts/2013-04-23-one-year-at-github.html
index a877a06..8d9623e 100644
--- a/_posts/2013-04-23-one-year-at-github.html
+++ b/_posts/2013-04-23-one-year-at-github.html
@@ -1,42 +1,36 @@
---
-layout: default
-title: One Year at GitHub
+layout: post
+title: 10 Important Things I Learned from One Year at GitHub (and probably other startups too)
+summary: About a month ago, I passed my one year mark at GitHub. Here's ten things I've learned...
---
-
About a month ago, I passed my one year mark at GitHub. Here's ten things I've learned:
-
About a month ago, I passed my one year mark at GitHub. Here's ten things I've learned:
+
1. Work on things you really care about.
+ At GitHub, we're told 'work on whatever you want.' The problem is there's so many things to work on at any given time, that it can be hard to focus on and ship one thing. Especially as your company grows. Suddenly pull requests involve hundreds of people with different opinions, insights, and feedback. Working on things you actually care about will lend you the patience you need to wade through it all while continuing to push things forward.
-
1. Work on things you really care about.
- At GitHub, we're told 'work on whatever you want.' The problem is there's so many things to work on at any given time, that it can be hard to focus on and ship one thing. Especially as your company grows. Suddenly pull requests involve hundreds of people with different opinions, insights, and feedback. Working on things you actually care about will lend you the patience you need to wade through it all while continuing to push things forward.
+
2. Learn to say no.
+ Overcommitting makes you feel and look like an asshole. It's okay to say 'no' when your plate is full.
-
2. Learn to say no.
- Overcommitting makes you feel and look like an asshole. It's okay to say 'no' when your plate is full.
+
3. Find your Emoji Spirit Animal.
+
-
3. Find your Emoji Spirit Animal.
-
+
4. Celebrate your ships.
+ However big or small.
-
4. Celebrate your ships.
- However big or small.
+
5. Don't take yourself too seriously.
+ You'll have a lot more fun when you learn not to.
-
5. Don't take yourself too seriously.
- You'll have a lot more fun when you learn not to.
+
6. Keep growing.
+ And learning from the people around you.
-
6. Keep growing.
- And learning from the people around you.
+
7. Don't be an asshole.
+ It's almost too easy to respond to pull requests, emails, IMs, and pretty much through every form of online communication without thinking something through. If someone's response to your work infuriates you (which will happen because you love what you do and you're super passionate), take a few minutes, or maybe even a night, and then re-read whatever initially made you upset. Respond with a clear head. Because odds are, it probably wasn't that big of a deal to begin with.
-
7. Don't be an asshole.
- It's almost too easy to respond to pull requests, emails, IMs, and pretty much through every form of online communication without thinking something through. If someone's response to your work infuriates you (which will happen because you love what you do and you're super passionate), take a few minutes, or maybe even a night, and then re-read whatever initially made you upset. Respond with a clear head. Because odds are, it probably wasn't that big of a deal to begin with.
+
8. Give your coworkers props. Endlessly.
-
8. Give your coworkers props. Endlessly.
+
9. People will disappoint you.
+ Forgive them and move on. Or leave. As Jen Myers once brilliantly put it, "hate takes so much more energy out of you."
-
9. People will disappoint you.
- Forgive them and move on. Or leave. As Jen Myers once brilliantly put it, "hate takes so much more energy out of you."
-
-
10. Ask questions.
- Surround yourself with people who will push you toward the right answers, instead of tearing you down for not having found them yet.
10. Ask questions.
+ Surround yourself with people who will push you toward the right answers, instead of tearing you down for not having found them yet.
diff --git a/_posts/2013-06-13-a-pep-talk-from-kid-president.html b/_posts/2013-06-13-a-pep-talk-from-kid-president.html
index 2a57e81..b611568 100644
--- a/_posts/2013-06-13-a-pep-talk-from-kid-president.html
+++ b/_posts/2013-06-13-a-pep-talk-from-kid-president.html
@@ -1,18 +1,14 @@
---
-layout: default
+layout: post
title: On Making the World Awesome - A Pep Talk from Kid President
+summary: '"What will be your Space Jam?"'
---
-
\ No newline at end of file
+
diff --git a/_posts/2013-07-09-a-different-perspective.html b/_posts/2013-07-09-a-different-perspective.html
index 0331a1b..7f2796f 100644
--- a/_posts/2013-07-09-a-different-perspective.html
+++ b/_posts/2013-07-09-a-different-perspective.html
@@ -1,51 +1,45 @@
---
-layout: default
-title: On Women in Tech - A Different Perspective
+layout: post
+title: "On Women in Tech: A Different Perspective"
+summary: I didn't grow up believing I could do anything I wanted to...
---
-
I didn't grow up believing I could do anything I wanted to.
-
I didn't grow up believing I could do anything I wanted to.
+
I grew up in a community where it wasn't that common for young people to continue their education past high school. Most of the people I went to school with ended up at jobs that pay just above minimum wage and that have very little room for growth or promotion. Most people I knew didn't believe they had the ability to change their circumstances and they very rarely moved up in socio-economic class.
-
I grew up in a community where it wasn't that common for young people to continue their education past high school. Most of the people I went to school with ended up at jobs that pay just above minimum wage and that have very little room for growth or promotion. Most people I knew didn't believe they had the ability to change their circumstances and they very rarely moved up in socio-economic class.
+
I was often discouraged from pursuing a career that required a college education. I knew that I wanted to do something different than what I saw around me. I knew I wanted to go to college, but I never thought much past college graduation because of how unlikely it seemed that I would make it that far.
-
I was often discouraged from pursuing a career that required a college education. I knew that I wanted to do something different than what I saw around me. I knew I wanted to go to college, but I never thought much past college graduation because of how unlikely it seemed that I would make it that far.
+
I didn't know a single computer scientist. I didn't know that 'web developer' or 'software designer' were careers. The only things that seemed within my reach were the jobs that either my parents or my friends' parents worked.
-
I didn't know a single computer scientist. I didn't know that 'web developer' or 'software designer' were careers. The only things that seemed within my reach were the jobs that either my parents or my friends' parents worked.
+
I stumbled upon my first job at a tech company by accident. And while all of the developers who worked there encouraged me to learn how to program and design, it wasn't until I saw a woman succeed in that environment that I thought it was also possible for me.
-
I stumbled upon my first job at a tech company by accident. And while all of the developers who worked there encouraged me to learn how to program and design, it wasn't until I saw a woman succeed in that environment that I thought it was also possible for me.
+
I now consider myself somewhat successful. I'm a designer and a developer at a company I love and one that is well-respected by my peers. The work I do doesn't feel like work. I make more than what my mother made when she retired after 38 years of civil service. And I get to do things I never thought I'd have the opportunity to. I get to travel, I set my own work schedule, and most importantly, I really do believe that I have the opportunity to affect change. Sometimes, if I'm really lucky, I get to inspire other people to do the same.
-
I now consider myself somewhat successful. I'm a designer and a developer at a company I love and one that is well-respected by my peers. The work I do doesn't feel like work. I make more than what my mother made when she retired after 38 years of civil service. And I get to do things I never thought I'd have the opportunity to. I get to travel, I set my own work schedule, and most importantly, I really do believe that I have the opportunity to affect change. Sometimes, if I'm really lucky, I get to inspire other people to do the same.
+
My experiences thus far have lead me to want to make it easier for people like me to succeed in this industry. So along with designing and building web applications, I've created some things that a younger, less experienced me would have benefitted from at the start of my career. These things do not exclude men from participating. Instead, they are aimed at strengthening the community around and surfacing the work of women who are respected by women and men alike.
-
My experiences thus far have lead me to want to make it easier for people like me to succeed in this industry. So along with designing and building web applications, I've created some things that a younger, less experienced me would have benefitted from at the start of my career. These things do not exclude men from participating. Instead, they are aimed at strengthening the community around and surfacing the work of women who are respected by women and men alike.
+
Every time I talk about what lead me to create Passion Projects, I am forced to revisit the negative experiences I've had in this industry. A coworker and friend recently pointed out that if I hadn't experienced these things, I might not be motivated to support other women in our community or create things that aim to improve the experiences for all women in this industry. Whether or not my efforts have had a positive net impact on the community, I can't be entirely sure. But my friend's words made me feel like I was moving in the right direction.
-
Every time I talk about what lead me to create Passion Projects, I am forced to revisit the negative experiences I've had in this industry. A coworker and friend recently pointed out that if I hadn't experienced these things, I might not be motivated to support other women in our community or create things that aim to improve the experiences for all women in this industry. Whether or not my efforts have had a positive net impact on the community, I can't be entirely sure. But my friend's words made me feel like I was moving in the right direction.
+
Over the years I've learned that the best way to make sure your experience doesn't go to waste is to invest it in the people around you. And for me, this is what I see Women in Tech initiatives doing. I see them building communities and support systems around the collective experience of other women in our industry.
-
Over the years I've learned that the best way to make sure your experience doesn't go to waste is to invest it in the people around you. And for me, this is what I see Women in Tech initiatives doing. I see them building communities and support systems around the collective experience of other women in our industry.
+
If you've succeeded without support systems like these, that's great. You have every right to be proud of yourself. Keep doing what you're doing, because it's clearly working for you. But when did it become any of our jobs to decide what can and does work for other women? It seems inherently wrong to attack or discredit the communities and support systems of other women because they aren't directly benefiting us. And unfortunately in doing so, we discourage people, specifically marginalized people, from reaching out for the support and resources they may actually want or need.
-
If you've succeeded without support systems like these, that's great. You have every right to be proud of yourself. Keep doing what you're doing, because it's clearly working for you. But when did it become any of our jobs to decide what can and does work for other women? It seems inherently wrong to attack or discredit the communities and support systems of other women because they aren't directly benefiting us. And unfortunately in doing so, we discourage people, specifically marginalized people, from reaching out for the support and resources they may actually want or need.
+
Sure, there are problems that have arisen as a result of more people paying attention to the lack of diversity in our industry. Some of these problems were addressed in a recent blog post and while I had a hard time agreeing with the author's conclusions about the impact of the Women in Tech movement, I found a few specific arguments to be valid:
+
+
I, too, am deeply bothered by the idea that women should or would be hired into roles they aren't qualified for, to meet a quota. It's a problem that I've been vocal about in hiring conversations and my concern has been met with respect and consideration by most.
+
+
As a woman, and someone from a mixed background, I, too, am offended when people use racial or gender-equality issues as a platform to promote themselves or to define their personal brand.
+
+
-
Sure, there are problems that have arisen as a result of more people paying attention to the lack of diversity in our industry. Some of these problems were addressed in a recent blog post and while I had a hard time agreeing with the author's conclusions about the impact of the Women in Tech movement, I found a few specific arguments to be valid:
-
-
I, too, am deeply bothered by the idea that women should or would be hired into roles they aren't qualified for, to meet a quota. It's a problem that I've been vocal about in hiring conversations and my concern has been met with respect and consideration by most.
-
-
As a woman, and someone from a mixed background, I, too, am offended when people use racial or gender-equality issues as a platform to promote themselves or to define their personal brand.
-
-
+
Now, a concession:
-
Now, a concession:
+
I don't go to every women-focused meetup or event. They're not all for me. But that's just it: if I don't find something useful or beneficial, I simply don't get involved. It doesn't offend me that they exist and it doesn't offend the organizers that I'm not there. And they certainly don't make my job as a woman in this industry any harder. I attend the meetups and events that I do find useful. I've personally benefitted from meeting other women who do the same things that I do and who run into the same challenges. I've been able to build and grow an amazing support system from these interactions. I think it's important to keep in mind that all WIT groups and meetups were started by someone who saw a need for them, and they probably provide value for people with similar needs and experiences.
-
I don't go to every women-focused meetup or event. They're not all for me. But that's just it: if I don't find something useful or beneficial, I simply don't get involved. It doesn't offend me that they exist and it doesn't offend the organizers that I'm not there. And they certainly don't make my job as a woman in this industry any harder. I attend the meetups and events that I do find useful. I've personally benefitted from meeting other women who do the same things that I do and who run into the same challenges. I've been able to build and grow an amazing support system from these interactions. I think it's important to keep in mind that all WIT groups and meetups were started by someone who saw a need for them, and they probably provide value for people with similar needs and experiences.
+
We'll always disagree with one another on what is and isn't valuable, because even amongst women, we're all very different. We come from different places, belong to different cultures, and learn in different ways. We should continue to disagree and have interesting and thoughtful conversations. Dissent is, after all, a byproduct of diversity. It's something we all should encourage and embrace. But I wonder if disagreeing needs to lead to attacking or attempting to discredit whole communities and support systems simply because we don't directly benefit from them.
-
We'll always disagree with one another on what is and isn't valuable, because even amongst women, we're all very different. We come from different places, belong to different cultures, and learn in different ways. We should continue to disagree and have interesting and thoughtful conversations. Dissent is, after all, a byproduct of diversity. It's something we all should encourage and embrace. But I wonder if disagreeing needs to lead to attacking or attempting to discredit whole communities and support systems simply because we don't directly benefit from them.
+
Things are getting better:
-
Things are getting better:
+
I see the tech industry growing and changing. I see more women at the conferences I attend, I work with more women on the technical teams I'm a part of, and I'm building and strengthening my relationships with other women in the community every day. These are all things that I personally value and that I believe are making tech a better place for myself and other women to be.
-
I see the tech industry growing and changing. I see more women at the conferences I attend, I work with more women on the technical teams I'm a part of, and I'm building and strengthening my relationships with other women in the community every day. These are all things that I personally value and that I believe are making tech a better place for myself and other women to be.
-
-
If you're interested in getting involved with women-focused groups or in supporting programs that women (of all ages) can benefit from, any of these awesome organizations are a good place to start.
If you're interested in getting involved with women-focused groups or in supporting programs that women (of all ages) can benefit from, any of these awesome organizations are a good place to start.
diff --git a/_posts/2013-10-10-is-it-sexist-to-recruit-women.html b/_posts/2013-10-10-is-it-sexist-to-recruit-women.html
index 1cf2e0a..790b07d 100644
--- a/_posts/2013-10-10-is-it-sexist-to-recruit-women.html
+++ b/_posts/2013-10-10-is-it-sexist-to-recruit-women.html
@@ -1,89 +1,83 @@
---
-layout: default
+layout: post
title: Is it Sexist to Recruit Women in Tech?
+summary: The full interview I gave to Dame Magazine about Passion Projects, role models, and sexism in tech.
---
-
I recently gave an interview to Dame Magazine to discuss whether or not efforts to recruit women in tech are sexist, and while answering questions over email, I realized I hadn't really sat down and written enough about my worries, reasoning, and motivations around Passion Projects. There's a ton of great stuff in this interview (that didn't get written about in the article) that I think everyone needs to hear.
-
I recently gave an interview to Dame Magazine to discuss whether or not efforts to recruit women in tech are sexist, and while answering questions over email, I realized I hadn't really sat down and written enough about my worries, reasoning, and motivations around Passion Projects. There's a ton of great stuff in this interview (that didn't get written about in the article) that I think everyone needs to hear.
+
Here's the full interview:
-
Here's the full interview:
+
1. Some say that Women in Technology Initiatives can do more harm than good, and that they don’t want to be seen as token females. As one of GitHub’s first female developers, did you ever feel a pressure to represent all female developers? What was that experience like?
-
1. Some say that Women in Technology Initiatives can do more harm than good, and that they don’t want to be seen as token females. As one of GitHub’s first female developers, did you ever feel a pressure to represent all female developers? What was that experience like?
+
I actually still worry about this pretty often. I think there's a misconception, even within GitHub, that I *speak* for all women at our company. Even amongst the Ladies of GitHub, we're a super diverse group of people. We're on different teams, some of us have families, some of us don't, we're from different parts of the world, have different backgrounds, different interests...It's not my job to be the figurehead of women at GitHub...but I'm protective of the culture we've built and want to enable more women to do awesome work and feel like they're valued as peers.
-
I actually still worry about this pretty often. I think there's a misconception, even within GitHub, that I *speak* for all women at our company. Even amongst the Ladies of GitHub, we're a super diverse group of people. We're on different teams, some of us have families, some of us don't, we're from different parts of the world, have different backgrounds, different interests...It's not my job to be the figurehead of women at GitHub...but I'm protective of the culture we've built and want to enable more women to do awesome work and feel like they're valued as peers.
+
2. How did things change for you personally once GitHub hired more women?
+
-
2. How did things change for you personally once GitHub hired more women?
-
+
I guess I hadn't noticed how much I missed working with other women.
-
I guess I hadn't noticed how much I missed working with other women.
+
I remember I was helping out a friend with a side project after work one day. We sat down and spent the night writing code together. It was just so...easy. To get along, to get on the same page, our arguments were productive and from the minute we sat down together there was an immediate sense that we respected each other.
-
I remember I was helping out a friend with a side project after work one day. We sat down and spent the night writing code together. It was just so...easy. To get along, to get on the same page, our arguments were productive and from the minute we sat down together there was an immediate sense that we respected each other.
+
I'm not saying these working relationships can't exist across genders. It was just cool to sit down with someone, write code, and assume that that other person was my peer. I didn't have to prove that I was as smart as them nor did I have to scream to be heard or have my opinion considered.
-
I'm not saying these working relationships can't exist across genders. It was just cool to sit down with someone, write code, and assume that that other person was my peer. I didn't have to prove that I was as smart as them nor did I have to scream to be heard or have my opinion considered.
+
I knew I hadn't felt this at GitHub in a while. So when I got back from working on that project with my friend, I posted this status update on our internal communication tool we call 'Team':
-
I knew I hadn't felt this at GitHub in a while. So when I got back from working on that project with my friend, I posted this status update on our internal communication tool we call 'Team':
+
"Made my first contribution to a friend's project tonight. Really fun to write code and work on projects with other lady scros [reference to the movie Idiocracy / inside joke]. Something I wish we had a little more of at GitHub. Which reminded me, it's been a while since we've hired a female engineer or designer. In fact, If we had a "Technical Lady Hubbers Hired" graph it would look like the one attached. Would anyone be interested in a few talks about growing an awesome female engineering culture from some amazing lady devs in the new year? I would be most willing to PRP [be responsible for] this effort."
-
"Made my first contribution to a friend's project tonight. Really fun to write code and work on projects with other lady scros [reference to the movie Idiocracy / inside joke]. Something I wish we had a little more of at GitHub. Which reminded me, it's been a while since we've hired a female engineer or designer. In fact, If we had a "Technical Lady Hubbers Hired" graph it would look like the one attached. Would anyone be interested in a few talks about growing an awesome female engineering culture from some amazing lady devs in the new year? I would be most willing to PRP [be responsible for] this effort."
-
-
That was the seed that Passion Projects would eventually grow from.
+
That was the seed that Passion Projects would eventually grow from.
-
There are women who are super comfortable with being the only woman in tech. Some of them see it as an advantage, you know, being the unicorn. Tina Fey has a great quote about this in her book Bossypants on career advice for women who work in a male dominated industry:
+
There are women who are super comfortable with being the only woman in tech. Some of them see it as an advantage, you know, being the unicorn. Tina Fey has a great quote about this in her book Bossypants on career advice for women who work in a male dominated industry:
-
“This is what I tell young women who ask me for career advice. People are going to try to trick you. To make you feel that you are in competition with one another. "You're up for a promotion. If they go for a woman, it'll be between you and Barbara." Don't be fooled. You're not in competition with other women. You're in competition with everyone.”
+
“This is what I tell young women who ask me for career advice. People are going to try to trick you. To make you feel that you are in competition with one another. "You're up for a promotion. If they go for a woman, it'll be between you and Barbara." Don't be fooled. You're not in competition with other women. You're in competition with everyone.”
-
I don't just want to hire more badass women, I'm focused on keeping them. I don't want to hire women and put them on a shelf like "look at all our women" (I'm sure this is the tokenism Lea's worried about). My motivation is not for GitHub to beat other tech companies in the percentage of female employees race. I don't care about that.
+
I don't just want to hire more badass women, I'm focused on keeping them. I don't want to hire women and put them on a shelf like "look at all our women" (I'm sure this is the tokenism Lea's worried about). My motivation is not for GitHub to beat other tech companies in the percentage of female employees race. I don't care about that.
-
I want to empower the women I work with, the women who inspire me. I want them to be more visible and I want other people to see that you don't have to be followed around by a fleet of nannies to be a successful woman in our industry. The women I see affecting change every day are so normal. We don't just need role models, we need to see people who weren't born on 3rd base succeed.
+
I want to empower the women I work with, the women who inspire me. I want them to be more visible and I want other people to see that you don't have to be followed around by a fleet of nannies to be a successful woman in our industry. The women I see affecting change every day are so normal. We don't just need role models, we need to see people who weren't born on 3rd base succeed.
-
3. Do you agree that the anonymity of the internet makes it more attractive to women?
+
3. Do you agree that the anonymity of the internet makes it more attractive to women?
-
Absolutely. My coworker Kyle wrote a pretty good blog post entitled 'Pixels Don't Care' you should it check it out.
+
Absolutely. My coworker Kyle wrote a pretty good blog post entitled 'Pixels Don't Care' you should it check it out.
-
4. Some argue against having female role models. You wrote in your blog, however, that seeing a woman succeed in your environment made you realize you could do the same. In your experience why are female role models important? How did it impact you to have a female role model?
+
4. Some argue against having female role models. You wrote in your blog, however, that seeing a woman succeed in your environment made you realize you could do the same. In your experience why are female role models important? How did it impact you to have a female role model?
-
You have to have a connection with the people you look up to. With your mentors. For me, it's incredibly important for the people who mentor me to have come from a similar community, have a mixed background, or be a woman. Or all of those things. It's about relating to them.
+
You have to have a connection with the people you look up to. With your mentors. For me, it's incredibly important for the people who mentor me to have come from a similar community, have a mixed background, or be a woman. Or all of those things. It's about relating to them.
-
My role model at my first company was all of those things. She prepared me for a ton of things that I was going to run into. And that she knew would upset me. In a lot of ways, she evened the playing field for me a little bit. And I try to do the same thing for the girls and women I mentor as well as those whom I work with.
+
My role model at my first company was all of those things. She prepared me for a ton of things that I was going to run into. And that she knew would upset me. In a lot of ways, she evened the playing field for me a little bit. And I try to do the same thing for the girls and women I mentor as well as those whom I work with.
-
5. What inspired you to create Passion Projects around the idea of featuring female role models? How is Passion Projects different from other Women in Tech initiatives?
+
5. What inspired you to create Passion Projects around the idea of featuring female role models? How is Passion Projects different from other Women in Tech initiatives?
-
I don't know how much it's different. One thing I've really pushed is that I don't want women to come and give talks about being women. I hate that. I get asked "What is it like to be a woman in tech" all the time. And I never really know how to answer that question. I think it goes back to the idea that every woman's experience in this industry is the same. They aren't.
+
I don't know how much it's different. One thing I've really pushed is that I don't want women to come and give talks about being women. I hate that. I get asked "What is it like to be a woman in tech" all the time. And I never really know how to answer that question. I think it goes back to the idea that every woman's experience in this industry is the same. They aren't.
-
I decided to ask these incredible women to speak about whatever project they're most excited about. This has kept the talks really diverse and interesting to everyone, not just women. The typical Passion Projects audience is usually split right down the middle, half men and half women. And I wouldn't have it any other way. It's just as important for men to see these women as role models as it is for women to.
+
I decided to ask these incredible women to speak about whatever project they're most excited about. This has kept the talks really diverse and interesting to everyone, not just women. The typical Passion Projects audience is usually split right down the middle, half men and half women. And I wouldn't have it any other way. It's just as important for men to see these women as role models as it is for women to.
-
6. You mentioned in your blog that you had some negative experiences early on. Can you share one story and explain how you dealt with the situation? How did that experience motivate you to create Passion Projects?
+
6. You mentioned in your blog that you had some negative experiences early on. Can you share one story and explain how you dealt with the situation? How did that experience motivate you to create Passion Projects?
-
To be honest, I created Passion Projects because I didn't want to dwell on the negative experiences anymore. I think I got to a point where I was so frustrated with the leadership in this industry. Because I would hear "We should hire more women!!" on almost a daily basis from the same people who kind of refused to respect me as a peer. So in a lot of ways Passion Projects was an attempt to call all of their bluffs. I was finally asking my founders and this industry to put their money and their support where their mouths are.
+
To be honest, I created Passion Projects because I didn't want to dwell on the negative experiences anymore. I think I got to a point where I was so frustrated with the leadership in this industry. Because I would hear "We should hire more women!!" on almost a daily basis from the same people who kind of refused to respect me as a peer. So in a lot of ways Passion Projects was an attempt to call all of their bluffs. I was finally asking my founders and this industry to put their money and their support where their mouths are.
-
The support from my coworkers, both female and male, has been totally fucking extraordinary and inspiring.
+
The support from my coworkers, both female and male, has been totally fucking extraordinary and inspiring.
-
7. What has been the biggest impact of Passion Projects? Any surprises or unexpected results?
+
7. What has been the biggest impact of Passion Projects? Any surprises or unexpected results?
-
I'm so happy with the communities that are being built around Passion Projects. And to be honest, It's really awesome that men are walking away from these talks inspired by these women speaking. It's great to see faces in the crowd I don't recognize. Because that means we're growing our community.
+
I'm so happy with the communities that are being built around Passion Projects. And to be honest, It's really awesome that men are walking away from these talks inspired by these women speaking. It's great to see faces in the crowd I don't recognize. Because that means we're growing our community.
-
8. Women in Tech Initiatives can certainly increase visibility, but what makes a company a great place for a woman to work once she’s hired? If you were looking for a job today, what criteria would you consider about the work environment?
+
8. Women in Tech Initiatives can certainly increase visibility, but what makes a company a great place for a woman to work once she’s hired? If you were looking for a job today, what criteria would you consider about the work environment?
-
I need to see women in leadership roles. I need to see them contributing to product decisions. And I need to see that women at these companies aren't being tricked into competing with one another.
+
I need to see women in leadership roles. I need to see them contributing to product decisions. And I need to see that women at these companies aren't being tricked into competing with one another.
-
9. You wrote: “Over the years I've learned that the best way to make sure your experience doesn't go to waste is to invest it in the people around you.” How did you learn this lesson? Why is this important?
+
9. You wrote: “Over the years I've learned that the best way to make sure your experience doesn't go to waste is to invest it in the people around you.” How did you learn this lesson? Why is this important?
-
I learned this by connecting with other women in my industry. I realized that I was internalizing a lot of problems that weren't really mine to begin with. And that there were better ways to handle shitty situations and conflict without blaming myself for other peoples's shit. It's my job to do my job, to design products and write code, and to be good at these things. It's not my job to correct the way that other people behave. Once I started talking to other women about some of these situations I was dealing with, I started connecting a lot of dots. And with their help and advice I was able to distance myself from these toxic situations and focus on the work I do.
+
I learned this by connecting with other women in my industry. I realized that I was internalizing a lot of problems that weren't really mine to begin with. And that there were better ways to handle shitty situations and conflict without blaming myself for other peoples's shit. It's my job to do my job, to design products and write code, and to be good at these things. It's not my job to correct the way that other people behave. Once I started talking to other women about some of these situations I was dealing with, I started connecting a lot of dots. And with their help and advice I was able to distance myself from these toxic situations and focus on the work I do.
-
I really wanna pay some of that forward. That's always been instilled in me. I think it has to do with coming from where I come from, seeing fucked up things and wanting to fix them.
+
I really wanna pay some of that forward. That's always been instilled in me. I think it has to do with coming from where I come from, seeing fucked up things and wanting to fix them.
-
10. Last but not least, is it sexist for companies to focus hiring on women? How do you find a middle ground between sexism and support?
+
10. Last but not least, is it sexist for companies to focus hiring on women? How do you find a middle ground between sexism and support?
-
Just to say they have? Absolutely. I struggle with this all of the time actually. And I'm incredibly careful about this internally and being clear that Passion Projects is not a recruiting mixer. I don't want the women who attend our events to feel like they're being preyed on. I've also been hesitant in partnering with other companies in any effort to scale the series specifically because I want them to have the right motivations. Sure, it's great your company wants to hire more women. But *why*? I think there are a lot of people talking about diversity in tech right now because they think it's what they're supposed to be talking about.
+
Just to say they have? Absolutely. I struggle with this all of the time actually. And I'm incredibly careful about this internally and being clear that Passion Projects is not a recruiting mixer. I don't want the women who attend our events to feel like they're being preyed on. I've also been hesitant in partnering with other companies in any effort to scale the series specifically because I want them to have the right motivations. Sure, it's great your company wants to hire more women. But *why*? I think there are a lot of people talking about diversity in tech right now because they think it's what they're supposed to be talking about.
-
Don't get me wrong, I plan on taking full advantage of this to try to even the playing field for women and for people who come from different socio-economic classes, and belong to different races and ethnicities.
+
Don't get me wrong, I plan on taking full advantage of this to try to even the playing field for women and for people who come from different socio-economic classes, and belong to different races and ethnicities.
-
But not because someone told me those are things I should care about, but because that's who I am. And I'd like to make it easier for more people like me to learn, succeed, and become leaders in tech.
+
But not because someone told me those are things I should care about, but because that's who I am. And I'd like to make it easier for more people like me to learn, succeed, and become leaders in tech.
diff --git a/_posts/2013-12-11-give-and-get-well.html b/_posts/2013-12-11-give-and-get-well.html
index 8e19a80..ddc487d 100644
--- a/_posts/2013-12-11-give-and-get-well.html
+++ b/_posts/2013-12-11-give-and-get-well.html
@@ -1,101 +1,95 @@
---
-layout: default
-title: Give and Get Well
+layout: post
+title: Give and Get Well in 2014
+summary: While we all take some time and space from our normal routines to breathe this holiday season, we should start thinking about how to better give to those who are less fortunate than us in 2014.
---
-
From now until the end of the year most of us will spend our time stuffing our faces with holiday treats, standing in line for last minute sales, and (hopefully) reveling in the company of our close friends and family. Our inboxes will be a little lighter and the cold will keep us in our apartments, or the lack thereof will send us running through airports and vacationing in places we don't normally call our homes. While we all take some time and space from our normal routines to breathe this holiday season, we should start thinking about how to better give to those who are less fortunate than us in 2014.
-
From now until the end of the year most of us will spend our time stuffing our faces with holiday treats, standing in line for last minute sales, and (hopefully) reveling in the company of our close friends and family. Our inboxes will be a little lighter and the cold will keep us in our apartments, or the lack thereof will send us running through airports and vacationing in places we don't normally call our homes. While we all take some time and space from our normal routines to breathe this holiday season, we should start thinking about how to better give to those who are less fortunate than us in 2014.
+
Maybe these are people in your hometown or maybe they're living in parts of the world you've never seen, but there are millions of people living without the basic necessities we take for granted every day.
-
Maybe these are people in your hometown or maybe they're living in parts of the world you've never seen, but there are millions of people living without the basic necessities we take for granted every day.
+
Sometimes the world's problems — poverty, starvation, corruption, just to name a few — can seem totally overwhelming. "I can't change the world, I'm just one person" you might say.
-
Sometimes the world's problems — poverty, starvation, corruption, just to name a few — can seem totally overwhelming. "I can't change the world, I'm just one person" you might say.
+
Things are changing. Technology has started giving us access to communities in need and the ability to give directly to people in places that otherwise would seem unreachable.
-
Things are changing. Technology has started giving us access to communities in need and the ability to give directly to people in places that otherwise would seem unreachable.
+
Recent Passion Projects speaker, Ligaya Tichy, gave a talk at GitHub HQ about giving charitably. Here are a few action steps that she laid out to start giving better and more responsibly:
-
Recent Passion Projects speaker, Ligaya Tichy, gave a talk at GitHub HQ about giving charitably. Here are a few action steps that she laid out to start giving better and more responsibly:
+
1. Do a little bit of research.
-
1. Do a little bit of research.
+
It's important to know how charities spend their money and how much of a real impact they're having.
-
It's important to know how charities spend their money and how much of a real impact they're having.
+
The good news is that Givewell.org has done some (or most) of the work for you. You can search for charities and non-profits on their site, and they'll give you a breakdown of where the money is going. They also do an analysis of each non-profit to determine how much of an impact they're making toward their relative cause.
-
The good news is that Givewell.org has done some (or most) of the work for you. You can search for charities and non-profits on their site, and they'll give you a breakdown of where the money is going. They also do an analysis of each non-profit to determine how much of an impact they're making toward their relative cause.
+
-
+
2. Choose a cause.
-
2. Choose a cause.
+
Decide what you're passionate about improving in the world. I'm deeply passionate about developing countries in Africa and about providing villages there with water and new forms of economic stimulation, so I recently started giving to charities like Give Directly.
-
Decide what you're passionate about improving in the world. I'm deeply passionate about developing countries in Africa and about providing villages there with water and new forms of economic stimulation, so I recently started giving to charities like Give Directly.
+
-
-
-
3. Give locally.
+
3. Give locally.
-
We walk past people in need every day. Give a homeless man, woman, or family a warm meal by replating your leftovers.
-
-
Start a replate movement in your city. Replating is anonymously dropping off leftovers on top of garbage bins all over the city for those in need of a meal. San Francisco is already home to the replate movement.
+
We walk past people in need every day. Give a homeless man, woman, or family a warm meal by replating your leftovers.
-
+
Start a replate movement in your city. Replating is anonymously dropping off leftovers on top of garbage bins all over the city for those in need of a meal. San Francisco is already home to the replate movement.
-
4. Get your friends and family involved.
+
-
Set up a campaign and ask your friends and family to donate to your cause.
- I've set up a Charity: Water Campaign for this holiday season, and have started asking my friends and family to donate, in lieu of sending me gifts. Charity: Water is "a non-profit organization bringing clean and safe drinking water to people in developing nations."
-
-
-
-
What if I don't have any money? Donate your time.
+
4. Get your friends and family involved.
-
There are opportunities in your city where you can donate your time to organizations that need help. Volunteer at your local food bank, like the SF Food Bank, which depends on volunteers like you and me to stay open for families in need. Or, volunteer to become a mentor at an organization like YearUp. Here's a list of tech-specific organizations that could probably use your help.
-
-
If you're a coder, sign up for Code Montage and get some open source and development experience while donating your time to working on technical projects related directly to social change.
+
Set up a campaign and ask your friends and family to donate to your cause.
+I've set up a Charity: Water Campaign for this holiday season, and have started asking my friends and family to donate, in lieu of sending me gifts. Charity: Water is "a non-profit organization bringing clean and safe drinking water to people in developing nations."
-
+
-
Mentor someone you know. Offer your time to marginalized people in the tech community, for free. An awesome example of this is Jen Myers's speaking office hours.
+
What if I don't have any money? Donate your time.
-
Hey, aspiring tech speakers! I have virtual office hours this Sunday for speaker mentoring. Let's chat: http://t.co/YoAypnqplN
There are opportunities in your city where you can donate your time to organizations that need help. Volunteer at your local food bank, like the SF Food Bank, which depends on volunteers like you and me to stay open for families in need. Or, volunteer to become a mentor at an organization like YearUp. Here's a list of tech-specific organizations that could probably use your help.
-
5. Get your company involved.
+
If you're a coder, sign up for Code Montage and get some open source and development experience while donating your time to working on technical projects related directly to social change.
-
Ask the company you work for if they'll match donations to charitable causes. Lobby for a match program like Brightfunds.
+
-
6. Go.
+
Mentor someone you know. Offer your time to marginalized people in the tech community, for free. An awesome example of this is Jen Myers's speaking office hours.
Showing up in a developing country isn't always the answer. In fact, sometimes it can hurt more than it helps. Exposing yourself to the ways the rest of the world is living, however, can change your perspective, encourage you to give more responsibly, and inspire you to live more sustainably.
+
5. Get your company involved.
-
Don't be a missionary. Do not treat people in developing countries any other way than you would your coworkers, friends, and family. It shouldn't have to be said, but people are people, regardless of where they make their homes or what they believe in. They do not need you. You're a guest, a student.
+
Ask the company you work for if they'll match donations to charitable causes. Lobby for a match program like Brightfunds.
-
Get to know people individually. Have conversations with women and men you would have never met under other circumstances. Have a beer. Tell stories. Shake hands. Laugh. Smile at people you pass on the street.
+
6. Go.
-
Understanding the way people live and the problems which are specific to their infrastructures, governments, communities, and cultures will help you to better understand how you can help.
If you really bond with people, their struggles start to feel more like your own. The world could use more understanding and more empathy.
+
Showing up in a developing country isn't always the answer. In fact, sometimes it can hurt more than it helps. Exposing yourself to the ways the rest of the world is living, however, can change your perspective, encourage you to give more responsibly, and inspire you to live more sustainably.
-
Accessibility is already starting to shape the world. The Internet has changed who can access information and where we can access it from. If there's anything we can give or teach to the developing world it's making resources more readily available, as well as making access to those resources more reliable and less expensive. Go to a developing country and volunteer to teach at a school or co-working space.
-
-
Now is the right time to get well.
+
Don't be a missionary. Do not treat people in developing countries any other way than you would your coworkers, friends, and family. It shouldn't have to be said, but people are people, regardless of where they make their homes or what they believe in. They do not need you. You're a guest, a student.
-
As important as it is to give well, now is just as good of a time to focus on getting well. Personal wellness is something of a taboo subject in our community, and people with mental illnesses are often looked at as defective, not unwell. But more people suffer from depression and anxiety disorders than you probably think. Tech specifically can be a fast-paced, competitive, and demanding industry to work in. We work long hours, sometimes upwards of 15 hour shifts. We deal with difficult people. Our social and work lives almost always overlap. It's like we never really leave work. And it's more stressful and harmful than most of us are willing to admit.
+
Get to know people individually. Have conversations with women and men you would have never met under other circumstances. Have a beer. Tell stories. Shake hands. Laugh. Smile at people you pass on the street.
-
Instead we joke that someone who lashes out at work is "bipolar," we poke fun at our more sensitive peers, and we drink to cope with the high intensity of our jobs.
+
Understanding the way people live and the problems which are specific to their infrastructures, governments, communities, and cultures will help you to better understand how you can help.
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The more stress that enters into our lives and our jobs, the more we tell ourselves we're smart, that stress is just another problem to solve, and that we can figure out how to handle these things on our own. That they're manageable.
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If you really bond with people, their struggles start to feel more like your own. The world could use more understanding and more empathy.
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I've now witnessed two former coworkers, both of whom I care deeply about, suffer from serious mental illness and I watched them suffer in silence until they both had breakdowns that would eventually lead to them losing friends, supporters, and eventually the jobs they loved so much and sacrificed so much of their personal health for.
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Accessibility is already starting to shape the world. The Internet has changed who can access information and where we can access it from. If there's anything we can give or teach to the developing world it's making resources more readily available, as well as making access to those resources more reliable and less expensive. Go to a developing country and volunteer to teach at a school or co-working space.
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Everyone should see a therapist.
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There's no shame in asking for help. Therapists are not only for "sick people." Therapists aren't just pseudo-sciency strangers with legal pads and head nods. Therapists can provide relief. They're objective parties whom you can unload on. They can give you practical formulas for approaching human-type problems or obstacles in your life. They can teach you to be more mindful.
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Now is the right time to get well.
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Every time I get a cold, I never realize quite how sick I am until it clears up. Depression can often feel the same way. Some of us don't know or realize how depressed we really are or what unhealthy things we're using to cope until we ask for help and start to heal. We can all get better. Rich, poor, women, men, senior, junior, young, old; we can all get a lot better, healthier.
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As important as it is to give well, now is just as good of a time to focus on getting well. Personal wellness is something of a taboo subject in our community, and people with mental illnesses are often looked at as defective, not unwell. But more people suffer from depression and anxiety disorders than you probably think. Tech specifically can be a fast-paced, competitive, and demanding industry to work in. We work long hours, sometimes upwards of 15 hour shifts. We deal with difficult people. Our social and work lives almost always overlap. It's like we never really leave work. And it's more stressful and harmful than most of us are willing to admit.
Instead we joke that someone who lashes out at work is "bipolar," we poke fun at our more sensitive peers, and we drink to cope with the high intensity of our jobs.
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The more stress that enters into our lives and our jobs, the more we tell ourselves we're smart, that stress is just another problem to solve, and that we can figure out how to handle these things on our own. That they're manageable.
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I've now witnessed two former coworkers, both of whom I care deeply about, suffer from serious mental illness and I watched them suffer in silence until they both had breakdowns that would eventually lead to them losing friends, supporters, and eventually the jobs they loved so much and sacrificed so much of their personal health for.
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Everyone should see a therapist.
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There's no shame in asking for help. Therapists are not only for "sick people." Therapists aren't just pseudo-sciency strangers with legal pads and head nods. Therapists can provide relief. They're objective parties whom you can unload on. They can give you practical formulas for approaching human-type problems or obstacles in your life. They can teach you to be more mindful.
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Every time I get a cold, I never realize quite how sick I am until it clears up. Depression can often feel the same way. Some of us don't know or realize how depressed we really are or what unhealthy things we're using to cope until we ask for help and start to heal. We can all get better. Rich, poor, women, men, senior, junior, young, old; we can all get a lot better, healthier.
While we all take some time and space from our normal routines to breathe this holiday season, we should start thinking about how to better give to those who are less fortunate than us in 2014.
So I'm sitting in my hotel room, about 6,000 miles from home. And instead of running through a talk I'm giving at RubyConf Uruguay tomorrow, I'm trying to decide whether I even want to speak at all anymore...
About two months ago I announced that I'd be speaking at a conference for the very first time. A friend reached out and asked me a pretty important question. "Why speak at all?"...
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